Harvard Professor Expels Obscene Amount Of Time & Energy Trying To Get $4 Back From Chinese Restaurant

Harvard Professor Emails Chinese Restaurant

What would you do if you discovered a restaurant, whose food you’d enjoyed, had overcharged you by $4 on what you’d expected would be a $53.35 bill? You’d probably feel annoyed, but do nothing, because you’re a lazy human just like the rest of us, right?

But now, imagine you’re a douchey associate professor at Harvard Business School, and a restaurant, whose food you’d enjoyed, overcharged you by $4. Bet that changes things, huh? No? You’re still a normal human, you think? Well, you think wrong. You’d raise hell and spend countless hours writing pointless emails to the humble owners of Ye Ole Mom and Pop Chinese Restaurant (real name, Sichuan Garden in Brookline Village), because your time isn’t valuable and you haven’t a thing more important (and certainly nothing more entertaining) to do, nosiree.

Read more ›

Miss Utah USA: Marissa Powell Trips & Falls In Her Own Word Vomit — VIDEO

Miss Utah Answer

The 2013 Miss USA pageant took place yesterday, Sunday, June 16, 2013, and the gowns were probably great and blah, blah, blah… who watches those pageants, anyways; right? But, as pageants are wont to do, the Question and Answer round is where we found our true breakout star: Miss Utah USA, Marissa Powell.

Read more ›

Charlie Sheen: Farrah Abraham Has ‘Tranny-Boobs’ & ‘Five O’Clock Shadow’ — Riotous Rejection Letter

Charlie Sheen Disses Farrah Abraham

Just yesterday (June 13, 2013), Farrah Abraham went running her mouth about how she and Charlie Sheen had been texting each other — the terrible twosome even planned to go on some sort of date-type-thing (weird; we know). Well, in a new, hilarious development, it seems that date will no longer be happening…

Read more ›

Chad ‘Ochocinco’ Johnson Arrested & Thrown In Jail — No Butts About It

Chad Johnson Arrested

Fallen NFL star, Chad “Ochocinco” Johnson, has been sentenced to 30 days in jail… because he slapped his male lawyer’s butt in court.

Read more ›

Kanye West Is Gay & Kim Kardashian Is A Lesbian — The Cold, Hard Truth

Kanye West Gay

Thanks to a certain characteristically out-of-touch celebrity gossip rag, questions about Kanye West‘s sexuality have recently risen to the surface.

Read more ›