Katy Perry Is A Sexy Alien (And Other Rant-om Thoughts)

Katy Perry Alien

Today, Katy Perry released the music video for her single E.T., featuring Kanye West. If you’re not already, it’s time to get excited, b*tches.

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Rosie O’Donnell Gets Her OWN Show — As One Monster Dies, Another is Born

Rosie O'Donnell Show

Sadly, The Oprah Winfrey Show will come to an end on May 25. I ain’t mad at that!

You know what I am mad at? – The Oprah Winfrey Network has given a new show to the grossest, most repulsive female person on the planet: Rosie O’Donnell. Gross.

A Rosie O’Donnell Show? God Help Us All

Does anyone really want to hear Rosie harp on and on about her lame opinions? NO.

If anyone wanted to hear her speak, Rosie Cheeks wouldn’t have been booted off of The View.

Duh.  Fail, fail, fail.  Obviously, the Harpo homies had to ensure that Oprah’s “replacement” was fatter, uglier, and louder than Oprah, so as to make everyone miss Oprah even more, thus serving her ever-enlarging ego.

This new show will be filmed on the exact same soundstage at Harpo Studios (in Chicago), as The Oprah Winfrey Show.

Rosie’s New Show Has Approximately One Person Excited

About this new show, Rosie said:

“It’s a huge thrill for me, and I’m beyond the beyond.”

Well, of course she’s thrilled, it’s the only real job she’s had in years. To make matters worse, Rosie is already set to do at least 130 episodes. ONE HUNDRED THIRTY!!!! Good god, pray help us through these dark, dark days.

The one comforting fact in all of this, is that Rosie’s show will not be on network TV, it will be on Oprah’s cable network OWN, which is only viewed by Oprah’s lame body of fans.

All I can say is, Thank GOD I don’t live in Chicago.

The Week In Ugly: Week of March 21-27, 2011

We had some unexpected ugly celebrities smack us in the face this week.  But don’t worry, that doesn’t mean that the usual ugly culprits were unexpectedly un-uglified. Now, that would be a real tragedy.  Ok, time to bring on the ugly…

Vanessa Hudgens

Vanessa Hudgens Ugly
WHAT happened, V.Hudge? You usually look so fab…

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Lindsay Lohan Is…DEAD?!? — R.I.P.

Lindsay Lohan Name Change
R.I.P. Lindsay Lohan

Yes. Sadly, Lindsay Lohan is no longer with us.

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American Idol Season 10 Recap: Top 11

American Idol Top 11
Fwends?

This show is torturous. Every week, viewers die a little more inside. At least we have J.Lo’s gorgeous-ness to comfort us as we lay dying.

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