Good lord, is it not bad enough that we have to see and hear about this ugly, mile-long-faced wench once, sometimes twice, a year?!?
Tori Spelling Pregnant
It’s not like some fabulous celebrity is pregnant. Tori Spelling is one of the absolute homeliest celebs in all of Hollywood … right up there with the likes of Bethenny Frankel, Renee Zellweger, and Jocelyn Wildenstein (aka The Cat Lady) – just to name a few.
Ok, that picture is a little mean-spirited, here’s one of Tori looking her absolute “best”:
Hahaa, we kid, we kid. OK, we don’t kid; that really is Tori’s best.
Tori Spelling Announces Pregnancy
Alright, alright, back to the pregnancy: Tori Spelling announced her pregnancy via Twitter (do celebs share their breaking news anywhere else?):
@torianddean: “I know there’s been a lot of speculation, so I wanted everyone to hear from me… Its official…Dean & I are PREGNANT!!!!”
According to Tori herself (you might say it came “straight from the horse’s mouth”), there’s been “a lot of speculation” that Tori was pregnant.
We wouldn’t know about this “speculation” nonsense, because we try our very hardest to avoid her ugly countenance. On the bright side, this will probably increase the material for The Week In Ugly.
Congratulations on the pregnancy, Tori Spelling; and thanks for reminding us of your ugly horsey face. Now, let’s take a look at some of Tori’s biggest competition in the category of “Ugliest Celebrity Alive” (in order of increasing ugliness):
Bethenny Frankel Pregnant:
People seem to like Bethenny, but she’s ugly as sin… and seriously, spell your name right.
Renee Zellweger: A Face So Ugly, It’ll Make You Cry
And the ugliest of them all is…
If you’re like us, and are completely bewildered, confused, and in complete shock, horror, and dismay over The Cat Lady’s face (so much so, that you have completely forgotten that this was originally a sTori about Tori Spelling), you need to Google “Jocelyn Wildenstein” and let the horrific story of her face unfold before your very own eyeballs.
Seriously, nothing in the world is even half as interesting as much as this woman’s face. It’s simply un-understandable. She paid hundreds of thousands of dollars to look like that. WTF?!?
My jaw literally dropped when I got to Cat Lady’s photos. Thank you for your kind and thoughtful link, but I am really having a tough time believing that NOTHING in the world interests you more than that fugly mug. I mean, Pia was on Ellen today – that’s gotta count for something!!
And as for Tori’s hot bod…agreed for the most part. But – damn – that photo you picked really makes her right teat look all kinds of crazy. The implant is shifted about three inches left of where the real breast tissue is supposed to be and it just looks all kitty. Kitty wampus.
Also, I noticed when I read the article on the main page that your article titles and the blog title weren’t in the usual curly font…but now that I am in comment mode they are normal. Ooooooh weeeeee…what’s up with that?
My statement about Tori having a hot bod was meant entirely sarcastically. Homegirl’s boobies are mad crazy!
Man Tori is so ugly she makes my asshole look handsome..Yeechh..She a three bagger…